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By the way, I don’t subscribe to the view that the
second Mrs. Watson was Violet de Merville, Violet Hunter, or anyone else
named in the Canon. Her very anonymity indicates the low regard Holmes and
even her own husband held for her.
Fortunately our tale has a happy
ending. Watson had maintained his medical knowledge — even after his literary
pursuits made the need to practice unnecessary. A few years ago, he read
about some intriguing new clinical trials. Always the man of science, he came
to the U.S. to participate in this research. His identity was carefully
concealed from almost everyone involved in the research, although he did
become good friends with another participant in the trials — a gentleman who
shared Watson’s pawky sense of humor and who could entertain the doctor with
many tales of Washington political life. Yes, Bob Dole was not the only well
known participant in the Viagra clinical trials. Watson had the satisfaction
of demonstrating the drug’s potency and expediting its FDA approval — after
all, if the drug could restore vigor to a 146-year-old sufferer from
impotence, how much more could it do for younger men?
Of course, by now, the second Mrs.
Watson was long gone. Watson felt no need to remarry, but he was looking for
feminine companionship. As we all know from his history with Mary Morstan,
Watson is partial to intelligent blondes. While visiting the Doles in
Washington, he found one — a lady whose husband had betrayed her repeatedly
and who wanted a partner whose discretion would be unimpeachable. Their
relationship has been a great comfort and consolation to her as well as a
source of considerable personal satisfaction to him. While their relationship
cannot be discussed further at this time, it is safe to say that when in
London, unlike Irene Adler, this lady does not go to church at St. Monica’s.
However, we’ll have to wait for Watson to tell us the story of the politician,
the White House, and the trained — well, let’s just say this bird is no
cormorant.
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SUSAN Z. DIAMOND; ASH (The
Lone Star), BSI (The Great Mogul), provided this
solution to the Watsonian Mysteries at the 1999 dinner of the STUD
Sherlockian Society.
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